Saturday, March 10, 2007

DIY Brain Surgery

Life is strange and interesting. I guess that is the thought one can take comfort in if everything else gets screwed up.

Welcome to the windy city, where d'you wanno go and what you gonna do?

When I was so much younger (ok, maybe an year back), before getting admitted into a good college, before the tension of board and entrance exams were long past, things seemed more carefree and happy-go-lucky than today. For some reason I felt reasonably sure that I would do well in life.

What am I looking for now?

Short term success? As in decent examination marks, doing well in college festival competitions, sports etc. I suppose so, yes. I would certainly be happy to meet some of these aims.

Long term success? What do I really want to do? Artificial intelligence? Something useful in computers? Physics? Mathematics? Deep down I just want to live comfortably and be respected, and more importantly be able to respect myself.

Love? Someone said,

Love is ego

Maybe I just want an ego boost.

My interests, activities, hobbies are developing. For better or worse, I cannot say. No longer do they completely revolve around computers (did I make a conscious effort towards this, I wonder), and going from GTK 2.10.1 to 2.10.2 does not hold the same thrill. I am taking a little more pleasure these days in sports, music and spending time with friends. Would this ever mean that I sacrifice my career to a lack of monomania?

Down the foggy ruins of time, far past the frozen leaves,
The haunted, frightened trees, out to the windy beach,
Far from the twisted reach of crazy sorrow.
Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free,
Silhouetted by the sea, circled by the circus sands,
With all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves,
Let me forget about today until tomorrow.

Y'know I have some faults (that reminds me to dedicate a post to lethargy) and one thing is that I do care about what other people think about me. Not just my good friends, but even anonymous internet users like you. Thats why I took a little trouble with the italics (hehe).

1 comment:

Unknown said...

We are all human inside, aren't we. Nice to read your stuff. Pretty entertaining.